Telling a first year that sex makes babies...

Step 1 : Throw condom at kid and instruct them to catch.

Step 2: Tell kid to open packet.

Step 3: Sit back and watch as a look of horror, amazement and disgust spreads over kid's face.

Step 4: Explain to kid what it is.

Desired result: Kid will get freaked out that it is slippery. They will feel grossed out. They will forget about storks etc. They won't know what to do with it. The kid will suffer from emotional scaring for several days/ weeks/ months. Every time the kid sees you they will run away looking scared.

Hmmm...the fun I have...